Tradition Honored or Defied? Learning to balance tradition with drive with Pamela Garcia Langton

Tradition Honored or Defied?

Learning to balance tradition with drive with Pamela Garcia Langton

 

I believe your life experiences make you who you are.  My personal history has driven me to become what I am today, a very strong Latina woman who has goals for herself, pride in her accomplishments, high aspirations for her children and an unconditional love for her family and friends.

Getting to know Camila Rosario, I am starting to realize how alike we are.  Being from similar upbringings, I imagine her female role models were much like mine; wonderful mothers, attentive wives, amazing cooks and immaculate housekeepers, who never thought they could, or, felt they deserved to pursue their dreams.

I had seven aunties, my mother's sisters, all who were very beautiful and come to find out, extremely talented artists, dancers, writers, musicians, singers etc.  Growing up around them, I would have never known any of this because none of them shared their talents.  In fact, I would say that it was never mentioned.  It was shameful to their father, my grandpa, that my mother wanted to be a singer. He taught her women had their place, it wasn't outside of the home and definitely not on stage.  At age 21, my mother had to sneak out of her bedroom window to perform with the jazz band that hired her as the beautiful lead singer because if her father knew what she was doing, the punishment would be unbearable.  I loved my grandpa but I don't believe he would be proud of me today and that makes me very sad.

When you grow up surrounded by old values and traditions you have two choices.  You go along with the way things have always been for generations or you fight for yourself and the future of your family and culture.  Well, here I am.  I am a fighter and I believe Camila is as well.  It is not that we don't love and respect our heritage, we want to make it better.

Don't get me wrong, I know we both love traditions like; Tamales on Christmas Eve, Piñatas at birthday parties, homemade flour tortillas (yummy), Quinceaneras, and Mariachi's at weddings!!!  However, passing down the tradition of being a woman afraid of living, afraid of dreaming, afraid of change, afraid of strength with no goals for yourself or your family is a tradition neither one of us wants to share.

Being a fighter isn't easy, you have to really want to change.  You have to leave a lot behind, which was a huge sacrifice for me the day I left my family in Los Angeles and I am sure for Camila when she left Puerto Rico.  You carry the burden of knowing you may be hurting your family by leaving, knowing they may never understand you are doing it for them and future children who will carry on after we are gone. 

 

Camila wants Nina to be a strong role model for her family, she is fighting for the future of her culture.  I want my children to be strong role models for their younger cousins, and believe me, I am seeing a change.  When I was growing up, many of my family members and friends were having babies at 16, with no goals or dreams for a better life.  I would love to believe my nieces and nephews want to go to college because my kids did, want to pursue their dreams because my kids are, want to make a difference because I am.